Therapy through Comedy (Blank Space Filk) [Revised]

Hey, folks. It’s been awhile. I’ve been doing a lot of personal work while facing significant challenges, health and otherwise.

One thing that I find therapeutic, and healing, and also fun, is filking. I can’t read music, but I sure can carry a tune. Like I said in my last Million Words post, I always have some song or another in my head. That’s why it’s so easy to filk.

On that note, I absolutely adore Taylor Swift. As a person she’s an inspiration, and her songs are always so fantastic. So it was fun to write this parody filk of “Blank Space”. And much like the I Will Survive / You Oughtta Know mashup I created last year, crafting this felt right.

Edit April 18, 2019: Somehow, I, um, forgot half the chorus. That's been fixed now.

Efforless (Sad Case)

(To the tune of Taylor Swift’s “Blank Space”; parody by Laura S. Taylor)

Heya sweetie, how’ve you been

How you’ve changed since we bid adieu

Thinning hair, sallow skin

Say, that ulcer looks good on you, but hey,

Don’t feel bad

It’s clear that you’re no Gallahad

That’s why you gave up what we had

Blissful nights, tender days

I was head over heels for you

Marriage vows, loving gaze

And I thought you felt that too, but you switched

Apron strings for wedding rings

And while you made my heart sing

Turns out you were foreshadowing

(The night we met, I thought you were joking)

You said you spelled it “effor”

Too much work for you to write the T

When you decided it was over

You didn’t bother to inform me

You couldn't be there when needed

That's the bottom line

And now you've made your bed (kinda)

But me, I'm fine

'Cause I was young and romantic

I trusted way too much

Believed in white-picket-fence love

But apathy's your crutch

I thought we were forever

Thought that we had everything

But you’re a sad case baby

And you crushed my dreams

Lost future, vanished friends

I was a pariah overnight

Fallen tears, loose ends

Pardon me for trying to fight for us

At first I tried

To save our love

But you denied

True feelings you just chose to hide

New arrival, supposed friend

She was conveniently present

Scheming hussy, feelings spent

She saw you and said,

“Oh my god, he’s the one

I want him, I’m having fun

Who cares if his wife comes undone?”

(They call it emotional cheating for a reason)

’Cause it was too much effor

Too much work for her to find her own man

She decided you should be hers

You chose to throw out what you had

You couldn't be there when needed

That's the bottom line

And now you've made your bed (kinda)

But me, I'm fine

'Cause I was young and romantic

I trusted way too much

Believed in white-picket-fence love

But apathy's your crutch

Got a long list of lies she’s told you

But you can't even do the math

’Cause you’re a sad case, baby, and she’s

A sociopath

Oh, adulting’s only hard if you force it

First you gotta, first you gotta own your shit

Yeah, you said you wrote it “effor”

Too much work for you to write the T

Communication was just too hard

For you to work it out with me

You couldn't be there when needed

That's the bottom line

And now you've made your bed (kinda)

But me, I'm fine

'Cause I was young and romantic

I trusted way too much

Believed in white-picket-fence love

But apathy's your crutch

Your cowardace was life-changing,

But I’ll be okay ’cause I see

That you’re a sad case baby,

And now I’m free